Thursday, January 29, 2015

Confessions of a Writer #2: So Close Yet So Far

I have a confession to make.

Lately, I've been plagued by doubt, fear, and nonsense talk.

You've heard of the saying, "So close yet so far."

Well I'm all too familiar with the phrase.

Image courtesy of Digital Arts at

So many times I've fallen short of something grand. Here are a few examples:

In 2011 I applied for the Barbara Karlin Grant. I was young in my career. You know the writer's high of a newbie where for every contest, every submission you are already dreaming of celebrating before you get the notice. Well, imagine my excitement when I received the letter in the mail. As I read the first line of the letter, my emotions skyrocketed with the words, "I am writing to present you with…(wait…for…it…)… this LETTER OF MERIT for your submission, I'M A MONSTER TOO!" My emotional high descended. I read on, "…you did not win the grant…" My heart plummeted. "…but the judges felt your proposal deserved extra recognition." And there it was. My emotion, suspended in air for a brief moment.

So close yet so far…

2. SCBWI Conference Critique by V.P. of Scholastics

In 2013 I attended the International SCBWI conference in LA and had the opportunity to sit down with the V.P. of Scholastics for a critique. In her words, "…this [my ms] is what we're looking for. I want you to revise your manuscript per my comments… I want you to send this to me…do you have an agent? You need an agent…I will recommend you to some who are here today…" STOP right there! Not so easy. I've been trying to get an agent since. Imagine the thought of having an editor waiting for you, but you can't get through the door. 

So close yet so far…

3. New Voice Contest by Lee & Low

This is the latest contest I entered. I didn't win. Surprise. Surprise. BUT I was sent a nice letter with nice comments from the editor stating that I was among the finalist. This news didn't disappoint me too much because by now I've developed a tough skin. But it's the thought of being…

So close yet so far…

And then there's this: 

A visual reminder of where I stand. Great. Story of my life. I received a few of the #2 ratings and I can't help but feel that life has a wicked sense of humor.

So close yet so far…

Can you imagine the torture? I don't mean to sound ungrateful, because I'm not. I'm very pleased at how far I've come. I'm just saying that the feeling of closeness is a big teaser for me.

I'll be honest, I have a full time job with two active kids with busy schedules of their own. As a mom, their schedule is added to my already busy schedule. But I make time between sporting events, during lunch breaks, in the wee hours of the night, and hours in between. I continue honing my craft. I take classes, read, write, get involved with writing groups on social media to stay informed. With all the hard work and effort put into my writing, I find myself questioning my writing career.

Do I want to pursue this?


How much longer can I subject myself to rejection?


Is this all for naught?

(nonsense talk)

Then I ask myself WHY do I write? 

The answer is simple.

I enjoy writing. 

Then I remind myself:

I enjoy writing because my inner spirit is released. There is still that kid in me wanting to explore and share a world of wonder. Writing is also like a vacation for me. I get to travel anywhere my imagination takes me.  I may question my writing future, but quit? I can't. Quitting is not in my vocabulary. As far as I think I am, there was always a word of encouragement and validation that I am a good writer. This gives me more determination to pursue what I love and that is to write.

Whenever I find myself questioning myself I look at this picture: 

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts." -- Winston Churchill


Friday, January 2, 2015

2014 A Year in Review

My intentions for 2014 was to streamline my life so I could concentrate on my writing. That involved putting a hold on some of my social media groups and athletic training. The first half of the year was spent editing/revising my WIP picture books and the latter half was spent taking writing classes. Below is a recap of the events that kept me busy during 2014:

Personal Life Events

May 19- June 23
I enrolled in Mira Reisberg and Sudipta Bard-Quallen's online course, The Pleasures and Craft of Poetic Techniques, offered by the Picture Book Academy.

It is an interactive e-course complete with a weekly webinar to make your writing sing. Now when I write, I am more aware of my word choices that will make my prose read aloud like verse.

June 9
I was invited to a Meet my Character Blog Hop by
Jennifer Chow, author of The 228 Legacy.
The questions Jennifer provided was a great opportunity to delve into the main character of my story.  It was also my chance to introduce my new eBook, Running Boy, published by MeeGenius on June 9.

June 21
I signed up for my local SF/South SCBWI agent's Day. It is an all-day affair about the author-agent relationship, tips on creating a memorable pitch, marketing, and picture book pacing. The best part of the event was the agent round table discussions where we got to do a Q & A up close and personal with the participating agents. They are all very lovely people; many that represented picture books.

Agents that were present:
Deborah Warren, East/west Literary Agency
Caryn Wiseman, Andrea Brown Literary Agency
Abigail Samoun, Red Fox Literary Agency
Sean McCarthy, Sean McCarthy Literary Agency
Mira Reisberg, Hummingbird Literary Agency
Laurie McLean, Foreward Literary

July 21 to August 15
Sudipta Bard-Quallen and Kami Kinard offered a free online course called kidlit Summer School. It is a month long course on writing strong and irresistible characters that ran 6 days a week. Faculty members consisted of kidlit authors. It was loads of fun and encouragement that kept me writing all summer long! Needless to say, it helped me with my character development.

August 4- September 22
I completed Kristen Fulton's fabulous 8-weeks Nonfiction Archaeology course. It was packed with information, videos, and webinars that kept me informed and inspired. If you are interested in writing nonfiction picture books, this course is a must. See my review of Kristen's course here. Thanks to Kristen, I got to complete my first nonfiction picture book this year!

During the month of November, I joined the Picture Book Idea Month (PiBoIdMo) challenge with Tara Lazar.  The challenge was to create 30 picture book ideas in a month. Tara had a terrific line up of guest bloggers and prizes galore! Sadly, I didn't win any of the prizes, but I still came out a winner with a notebook, of not 30, but 31 ideas!

Between writing, revising, and taking classes, I read loads of picture books. The best way to learn to write picture books is to read them. I've kept a tally on Goodreads. Below is a collage of the books I've read in 2014.



The end of the year is also a time to reflect on all those who continue to inspire me as a writer. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank the following for their support, encouragement, and camaraderie:

Kidlit 411
Picture Book Academy
Agent/Editor Discussion Group
Kristen Fulton
Mira Reisberg
Sudipta Bard-Quallen
Kami Kinard
Susanna Hill Leonard
Tara Lazar

Julie Hedlund

My critique group:
The Prose Shop
Picture Book Critique Group
And my new friends at kidlit manuscript swap

Monday, December 1, 2014

Crossing the PiBoIdMo Finish Line!

I did it!

I crossed the finish line!

My First Marathon- The 2006 Honolulu Marathon

No, not another marathon.


I completed Tara Lazar's annual PiBoIdMo (Picture Book Idea Month) with not 30, but 32 ideas!


Winnah, winnah, SUSHI dinnah!

I love sushi. 

Coming up with ideas wasn't easy. I splashed in puddles, tumbled through a pile of leaves, and slid down slides, narrower than my hips to find my ideas.

What does it mean to cross the finish line? You can read about my first marathon and find out how that transformed me. But that's a different story.

Completing the PiBoIdMo challange means I belong to a select group of writers, armed with 30 ideas. But crossing the finish line doesn't end there. The real challenge is to transform the ideas into completed stories. 

Who is ready for the next challenge?


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